i used to laugh all day long.

this season is just so unbearable.
im trapped between autumn and winter.
the combinations of both is the most bitter.

i think i dont look forward to christmas.
this season of joy.

we used to laugh all day long. even though christmas kept us from outside. we were laughing at each other. because the snow prevent us from going out. laughing at how pathetic we are and that brought me some comfort and joy. because there was no other ones to enjoy this season togther. thats why we were there. and enjoying the warmth instead of enduring the cold.

christmas just freeze us. stopped us from going where we are heading.
it is just a stupid useless assumption. just a stupid dream.