[[ Its the peak ]]

[[ Its the peak ]]

I'm gonna be draggy for this entry but I'm not gonna care.. Its my blog.. my style and everything..

lemme dragged a bit.. yesterday.. my world was falling apart.. and today my world is picking up..

It was near the peak in my world.. But it could be at the bottom the next day.. It is fast.. everchanging so fast.. perhaps ttz life.. with ups and downs.. Let it rise and rise~..

Met up my 10 yrs fren.. cheerios to our 10 yrs of frenship bahs~ and then my brother.. and then amy and gera..~

It was actually all my closest peeps i met today.. such scenarios are really hard to come.. the last is probably on my birthday..?

We talked.. chatted.. It had been quite some time before i met dem.. It was awesome.. The amount of things we talked is continuous... I feel much more comfortable with dems.. It was tt kinda old comfortable feeling back den.. And we walked in the shopping centres.. We were hooked to our conversations.. And i feel natural.. hard to explain.. I need not wear my mask.. I can be myself.. I can be true.. The feelings true and pure..

And i spend quite much on arcades today but it was alrite.. The amount of fun is worth it.. Gera amy and i kill quite much time at coffee club.. updating each others life.. and we were envious of one another.. I'm tired.. drained and exhausted but it was worth it..

And i meet my brother.. went arcade and eat dinner.. It was rather nice to go out with ur fellow siblings.. esp different genders.. And i really like it.. I have to admit.. I love my brother.. hopefully he dont read this.. i know da sao would =).. ur secret.. my secret.. hahas.. It was understood.. and my brother though i hates him at times.. due to the quarrels.. but i hav to admit.. He is my *thumbs up brother.. though he doesnt rather care bout my life.. not interested.. but he treats me if we go out together.. he wasnt working.. didnt have much money though.. but sometimes i treat him too and i like the part hanging up with him till late nights.. or playing computer games with him..and he would buy food for me.. and i would too.. it was countless.. i didnt mind.. to build up relationships with jus a lil bit of money.. sometimes he is full but he will still eat it.. and do you see siblings of diff gender going out together..? It still exists but not often.. And he would come to meet me if he hav the mood to.. and though sometimes i irritates him.. but he rawkz.

I met another brother of mine.. my god brother.. soon kwee in bk.. he is my only god brother i admit now.. the rest was like childish thinkings in the past.. but soon kwee is really nice.. He dotes on me but still the maternal brother is better.. though soon kwee didnt quarrel with me..

The feeling is just so different. cant really compare.

And my 10 years of friend.. We were still arguing yesterday and we were completely fine after a talk.. just a talk.. no matter how hard we quarrel.. After a talk.. We'll be okay.. We will argue until we slammed each other's phone and the next day.. we'll be normal and the argue was never to be mention..

I love my old friends. I feel comfortable. The feeling was just like before. They understood what and how i feels.. What im thinking.. and whatever.. We can make fun of each other and the feeling is just so different from now.. where the "revenges" is so scary.. I carnt explain that.. but in YJ.. Do we build our relationships with all the pack of lies.. the making fun.. the suaning..

I carnt be myself.. I was contradicting myself..I said before that I wanna remove my mask before going in YJ.. to be myself.. I want to remove my mask and be myself in YJ.. but the only 3 weeks in YJ.. make me feels that.. I am not wearing a mask in the old days.. I am wearing one in YJ.. but to be honest.. Its the true me in YJ.. but i carnt be myself at times..

Seriously I am afraid of peeps in YJ.. they are fakes.. I didnt know whether is their true self or what.. Did i offend them..? Sometimes they can suddenly turn their backs and be another person.. I couldnt even figure out whether its a joke or what.. It is unseen.. unheard.. threatening and menacing..