Autumn
i realised in this world, there is two different kind of people.
night time is coming. i'm not myself anymore. everything just feel so weird. empty places. empty minds. empty hearts. i think i grew scared. i grew isolated. i grew fearful of everything. i would not speak to anyone with sincerity right now. other than my uncle, i'll not speak anything that comes out from my heart right now. the dark just transforms me into a robot. just like the days before. the hardest times to go through. i went through and i transformed. robots. robots have no feelings. robots just pretend. they got dark memories that haunt them. and they'll never have any feelings. the night just turns more lonely. especially at home. empty home. it is taunting because home is never left empty unless there is emergencies. and when there are, the house grew quiet and cold. this is why home is left empty. you know when house is a concrete thing. but a home is not. a home is more like a place in my heart to me. it isnt any big deal. but now, it is. situation is. especially i get too paranoid now, nothing no one can calm me other than my parents. i can give them my hands without any hesitation. i know they'll lead me to a place which is safe. where i don have to worry at all.
I guess im changing. I dont know how to put things across. especially my feelings and thoughts. i cant express it. even though i kept thinking of certain things but i guess its best not to expose them. i cant express it too. and people never understood. and people never understand. no matter how close people can get, they wont understand. will never. I have many many things to say but i could not express it.
today i learnt in literature lesson. seasons with life and time.
i guess its autumn now.
The season of dying. dying love. dying relationships.
The season where time comes to a slow down. everything was emphasized purposely. making it very difficult and painful to go through. everything was damaging you twice. intentionally. unintentionally. everything was dull and brown-coloured. everything was silent and only the rustling of leaves can be heard. nothing is left. everything dies off. the season of dying. the season of death.
Silence is a result of tolerance. the story ends with a goodbye. the tracks of disappearance.
everything is in autumn now.
night time is coming. i'm not myself anymore. everything just feel so weird. empty places. empty minds. empty hearts. i think i grew scared. i grew isolated. i grew fearful of everything. i would not speak to anyone with sincerity right now. other than my uncle, i'll not speak anything that comes out from my heart right now. the dark just transforms me into a robot. just like the days before. the hardest times to go through. i went through and i transformed. robots. robots have no feelings. robots just pretend. they got dark memories that haunt them. and they'll never have any feelings. the night just turns more lonely. especially at home. empty home. it is taunting because home is never left empty unless there is emergencies. and when there are, the house grew quiet and cold. this is why home is left empty. you know when house is a concrete thing. but a home is not. a home is more like a place in my heart to me. it isnt any big deal. but now, it is. situation is. especially i get too paranoid now, nothing no one can calm me other than my parents. i can give them my hands without any hesitation. i know they'll lead me to a place which is safe. where i don have to worry at all.
I guess im changing. I dont know how to put things across. especially my feelings and thoughts. i cant express it. even though i kept thinking of certain things but i guess its best not to expose them. i cant express it too. and people never understood. and people never understand. no matter how close people can get, they wont understand. will never. I have many many things to say but i could not express it.
today i learnt in literature lesson. seasons with life and time.
i guess its autumn now.
The season of dying. dying love. dying relationships.
The season where time comes to a slow down. everything was emphasized purposely. making it very difficult and painful to go through. everything was damaging you twice. intentionally. unintentionally. everything was dull and brown-coloured. everything was silent and only the rustling of leaves can be heard. nothing is left. everything dies off. the season of dying. the season of death.
Silence is a result of tolerance. the story ends with a goodbye. the tracks of disappearance.
everything is in autumn now.
posted by gardenfestival at 7:43 PM
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