[[ dont know how.. ]]

[[ dont know how.. ]]

Why carnt the world stop irritate me? I am moody. WHY? BCOS NOTHING GOES SMOOTHLY FOR ME THESE DAYS. I am already looking positively but it just don run things smoothly for me. what the hell when these nonsense ever stop? I am down. down. down.

It all started weeks ago. FOR WEEKS. CAN YOU IMAGINE?

I WANTED TO ASK WHY BUT WHO COULD HAVE THAT ANSWER.

No point listing out all my bad happenings. its over. everyday i prayed for a better day. a smooth day but nothing was smooth at all. I dont know why but i am breaking down..

Some moron send me virus and didnt even feel sorry and didnt even apologised. Anger? Its all in me now.. All the F words are running through my head right now..

I dont understand why but I am unlucky these days.. A series of unfortunate events..

I have been missing my bus for 5 times this term.. Its only barely 3 weeks.. Everytime I reached the bus stop the bus just went.. I wanted to leave the house early but things always happen.. drop my lens and searching over the toilet.. why?

I have been late for school 3 times.. and 2 times took a cab down.. its waste my money.. and its like for the past 4 days I have been ended up somewhere unknown.. When I took the bus home.. I slept and woke up at some unknown area.. Yesterday I woke up and I am at tiong bahru.. the day before bugis area.. I am drained..

Some teacher is trying to make my life like hell.. I have a perfectionist CT.. and who wants everything to be in perfectly.. My GP teacher is nice and I carnt afford to not do my A level project work.. My maths teacher treats me so nice that I couldnt dont do her tutorials.. And if i dont hand in on time.. I will have zero zero and zero for daily work and you get to see me in MI next year.. And my chinese teacher just struck on me that I feels so enlightened. I wanted to do well in MT as well but see.. I didnt do anything.. My literature teachers.. One is boring but nice. The other is giving me hell.. I was caught being late during his lecture 1 week ago.. and was screamed and yelled at.. and told me to sit on the lecture theatre floor where the whole theatre had a good view on me.. He caught me yawning during his tutorial and splashed one bottle of water at me.. My friends was yawning all the way.. I wasnt even sleeping at all.. I didnt sleep.. It was going to be the end of his lesson and it all happens..

blame it on my luck. why does he have to purposely pull me down in front of so many people? I must have owe him in the past.

For my studies.. The starting song of lifehouse can fit in all..

"What day is it..
And in what month..
This clock never seemed so alive..
I can’t keep up and I can’t back down..
I’ve been losing so much time.."

I am optimistic. I told myself if I didnt miss that bus. I would probably involved in a car accident. but how many accidents can i assure myself? and I am just in total bad luck.

I am stressed. I am overworked. I hadnt had a good sleep for long. My eyes are wearing out. I drank 3 cans of coffee everyday. My eyebags are like dictionary that thick. My eye rings are as black as the pandas'. Everyday I woke up thinking how nice if i am sick today. I can skip tt stressful school.

Right now. I am just simply crazy. I am tired. really tired. and if you believe me.. I am in tears.. I carnt take it anymore.. When will heaven pity me? I keep praying and praying but nothing goes right for me.. I dont want to study all day.. I want to play.. have fun but i have got no time.. I am really afraid.. I dont want to go MI..

I hadnt been watching television programmes for months. I dont know the latest serials. Dont ask me anything about tv. I hadnt been flipping thru magazines. I dont know the latest news. I hadnt been hearing to songs. I dont know the latest songs.

Thats my life. How sad how pathetic. Pity me.

I dont know how.

I am just lost.

I might quit all my entertainment. I dont feel like going online anymore. My computer is nuts. I went to my brother's only hoping to have some time to play but virus attack. how lucky i am.

"What day is it..
And in what month..
This clock never seemed so alive..
I can’t keep up and I can’t back down..
I’ve been losing so much time.."

I dont know how.

I am just lost.